August 1, 2012 § Leave a comment
A week from tomorrow (or today, by the time I’m done with this post) marks my two-year anniversary of moving to New York. I guess maybe it’s a little silly to feel so sentimental about things like this, but I like to keep track of my progress since specific points in the past. It keeps me from wallowing in too much self-pity, I suppose.
I wish I knew how to get some rest. Maybe I’m just never satisfied that I’ve done enough to call it a day. There’s always so much on my to-do list that never gets crossed off that I’m not sure I’ll ever be satisfied. There are serious drawbacks to being a lazy overachiever.
Well, August may be a crazy month as I scramble to see what I can set up after my dream internship expires after the 6-month mark. I will have to make myself be okay with being a hermit workaholic for a while. I miss seeing my running team friends, but my design life requires my full attention until I find comfortable footing. Everything else will just have to wait a bit, and I hope that I have the discipline to give this everything I have. Maybe it’s one of the few times when I can use any feelings of loneliness that I might have to my advantage. I know that as long as I work hard now, happier times will definitely lie ahead.
I am really trying hard to be happier with myself. If I can’t even love myself, then this earth is an incredibly desolate place to wander.